82. ~ 20,000 Quips & Quotes, compiled by Evan Esar, 1968 If at first you don't succeed, blame it on your wife. 136 Copy quote. If at first you don't succeed, try doing it again. Related: 101 Funny Quotes. 81. - David Brent Quotations: Authors: Topics: . "If at first, you don't succeed, then . 16. If at first you don't succeed, take the tax loss. Abraham Lincoln If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. Quotes about: Succeed. Nothing is better than eternal happiness. All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. Homer Simpson quotes (Fictional character from the animated television series created by Matt Groening, The Simpsons.) William Lyon Phelps Funny Loser Find First Out Quotes to Explore I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. Funny Wife Quotes. Without a dope beat to step to. Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life. Short Witty Quotes "The next time you have a thought… let it go." Ron White "I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. If you searching for the best but short funny quotes, then you are on the right station. "if at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". ~ Steven Wright. Funny life quotes and sayings "Life is like a sewer - what you get out of it depends on what you put into it." - by Tom Lehrer 71 Copy quote. ~Charlie Sheen . About: Funny quotes. If at first you don't succeed, then drag racing isn't for you. 4. ~ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Funny First Succeed If At First Much Quotes to Explore I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.' The saying was popularized by Edward Hickson (1803-70) in his 'Moral Song' and is now applicable to any kind of activity." From Random House Dictionary of Popular Proverbs and Sayings by Gregory Y. Titelman (Random House, New York, 1996, Page 154). - Steven Wright 174. Love, Inspirational, Life. Add to Chapter. Fear is temporary, regret is forever. Marcelene Cox If at first you don't succeed. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you. "I like work; it fascinates me. Getting married is like a class on Shakespeare. Kirk Kirkpatrick Aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment. 5. Marriage is a three ring circus: Engagement ring, Wedding ring and Suffering. Teach a man to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity." — Karl Marx, philosopher and author 17. Steven Wright First Succeed Then Definitely You Quotes to Explore In the first place, God made idiots. I hope you enjoyed these funny motivational quotes for entrepreneurs! 1. "If at first you don't succeed, quit. Then you dust yourself off and try again. If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Best Funny Work Quotes. You might also like our list of Short Positive Quotes. There's no point in being a damn fool about it." W. C. Fields quotes ( American Comic and Actor, 1880 - 1946) Similar Quotes. Try, try, try again. 83. The key to overcoming the fear of failure is to realize that if you don't attempt it, you have failed by default. Thomas H Palmer If at first you don't succeed, blame your parents. William Lyon Phelps If at first you don't succeed, blame your parents. ". I was in a speed reading accident. If at first you don't succeed try doing it the way MOM told you to in the beginning. Start every day off with a smile and get it over with. Then quit. 226 quotes from Steven Wright: 'Right now I'm having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. "Even I don't wake up looking like Cindy Crawford." —Cindy Crawford. Always believe that something wonderful will probably never happen. 97. Find the best price and latest . "The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up." — Mark Twain . 17 Copy quote. "If at first, you don't succeed, quit. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book. 40. Give up and try something else. ~ Formula for success: rise early, work hard, strike oil. Tis a lesson you should heed. It is absolutely true. All you need in this life is not caring about other's opinion and confidence, and then success is sure. Philosophers, Poets and Fools have similar Consciousness — Amit Gupta. "If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'" ~ Dave Barry. If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style. "If at first you don't succeed . 7. 3. Editors' Choice, Impossible Demands, Sarcasm, Tech Support, USA | Right | September 28, 2009. William Edward Hickson. Winston Churchill ~ J. Paul Getty. You'll have to use the stairs… one step at a time. Show source. Indecision is the key to flexibility. It's been a long time, we shouldn't have left you. Groucho Marx No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar. 96. I was born to live, not please everyone. even the devil was once an angel. 'If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.' - Quentin Crisp 'If at first you don't succeed, try management.' - Unknown 'Aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment.' - Dilbert 'Life is like a dogsled team. "No, you don't have to repeat yourself. 50+ amazing tuesday morning funny quotes & images no comments | aug 25, 2017. If at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you. If at First You Don't Succeed Try Doing What the PE Teacher Told You to Do: Funny PE Teacher Appreciation Gift — Sheeja Jose. :: A Place for Strength ::. If at first you don't succeed, remove all evidence you ever tried. Funny Positive Marriage Quotes. ~ Earl Wilson. ~ 20,000 Quips & Quotes, compiled by Evan Esar, 1968 "I find television very educational. It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means." Henry Youngman quotes (English born American Comedian and Violinist, 1906-1998) Similar Quotes. The elevator to success is out of order. Elbert Hubbard. "I don't trust anyone who does their own hair. The phrase became popular by Edward Hickson's "Moral Song". If you first don't succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you." You're the only one that I have, and you're the only one I will ever have. Initially coined by Thomas H Palmer, a famous educator as a way of encouraging children to do their homework. Add to Chapter. Scott Adams/Dilbert Life is like a dogsled team. " If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. ~ Don Herold. "All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure." ~ Mark Twain. "If at first you don't succeed.. try doing it the way your wife told you!" SEE MORE: Belated Wedding Messages. Hey Sexy! William Lyon Phelps quotes (American Educator, Journalist and Professor, 1865-1943) Similar Quotes. Love always your toilet. When life gives you lemons, quit. If At First You Don't Succeed, White Lie Again. I hate necks." Steve Martin "If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything." William Lyon Phelps "Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day." Samuel Goldwyn Mark Twain If at first you don't succeed, try management. Conclusion. "People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day." You always miss 100% of the shots you don't take. 1. 100 Funny Work Quotes. Life Quotes Love Mom Quotes Great Quotes Quotes To Live By Funny Quotes Mom Sayings Quotes Pics True Sayings Inspire Quotes More information . When life gives you lemons, quit. If you try to fail and succeed, then which have you done? Mark Twain Don't think about your errors or failures; otherwise, you'll never do . W. C. Fields quotes "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Dust yourself off and try again. Vomit and shit, even your own, stink. *Focus on the process. Whether you're looking for funny quotes to make a point, enliven a presentation, give a toast, or just for your own amusement, you've come to the right place. . This funny life quote teaches you two lessons: first is the intelligent way to borrow money, and second is: try to be optimistic in any situation if not, the others can take unfair advantage of you. If you sprinkle when you tinkle please be sweat and wipe the seat! ~ Alan Lewis. You're born, you work, you die. - Mark Twain 175. 3. Find this Pin and more on Quotes/Memes by Chrystal Wolf. Me: "I'm . 173. Amid all the jokes and Jones at husbands and wives it's easy to forget that marriage is pretty awesome. *Everyday is a good day to SUCCEED! I hit a book mark and flew across the room.' You can be replaced. "A simple job for simple people.". Practically a third of my life is over. - Lewis Grizzard 'The best way . "If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you." ~ Steven Wright. . If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else. Best Funny Quotes "If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!" ~ Mae West "The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary." ~ Vince Lombardi , Funny quotes about work *Success is achieved and maintained by those who try-and keep trying. See also Quotes about: Fool, Succeed. Yeah, what they said! Then quit. And if at first you don't succeed. Then he made school boards. Shop if at first you dont succeed try doing long sleeve t-shirts created by independent artists from around the globe. If at first you don't succeed. 17. 4. even the devil was once an angel. Read also: 173 Best Motivational Gym Quotes Happy anniversary. 80. Caller: "I can't access your network!". > T-Shirt quotes > funny quotes > famous quotes > movie quotes > sayings > proverbs > funny sayings > Inspirational Quotes > Cute Quotes > Friendship Quotes 85. Funny Success Quotes Group 1 If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. "I shoot an arrow into the air, where it lands I do not care: I get my arrows wholesale!". Francis Bacon. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. Curly Howard Quotes and Sayings - Page 1. Funny bathroom graffiti quotes. My Account Help Add the "Dynamic Daily Quotation" to Your Site or Blog - it's Easy! If At First You Don't Succeed Flush Again Bathroom Poster Paper Type: Poster Paper (Semi-Gloss) Your walls are a reflection of your personality, so let them speak with your favorite quotes, art, or designs printed on our custom Giclee posters! I don't think it's natural." —Truvy Jones, Steel Magnolias. So use these positive marriage quotes to celebrate the good in getting married. I love you, wifey! My Power Words and Thoughts! About: Love quotes, Meaning quotes, Men and Women quotes, Affection quotes, Tenderness quotes, Houses quotes. That is where most accidents happen." sarcastic quotes about hater "your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth." sarcastic quotes about haters "haters are my favorite. "Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. I can sit and look at it for hours." ~ Jerome K. Jerome. "No man goes before his time—unless the boss . - Mitch Hedberg Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable. - Fran Lebowitz Users who liked, "If at first you don't succeed, find out if the.", also liked I recently turned sixty. Add to Chapter. 84. When the going gets tough, the tough just quit." - Jim Rome "It's always funny until someone gets hurt. — Christopher Titus. Find this Pin and more on Great Words Said by Kathy Metke. "If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving." 42.) That was for practice. ~ Arthur McAuliff. Short Funny Motivational Quotes. Then it's just hilarious." - Bill Hicks "f you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late . Groucho Marx Do not take life too seriously. Henny Youngman If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer. You can dust it off and try again. "It's okay if you don't like me. If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. Other days I put my keys in the . Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book." - Groucho Marx. 17. - David Brent. We can use this phrase in our work, dating, or social life. "If at first you don't succeed, fix your ponytail, and try again." 11. Just dive below and read some most hilarious short. "If at first you don't succeed . Be optimistic! Tags: Funny Wife | Marriage | Success | Listening a Person |. (Note: I help callers with connection problems with our wireless zones along train lines.) Marcelene Cox Funny Parents Blame First Your Quotes to Explore I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. Robert H. Schuller (1993). 2. Users who liked, "If at first you don't succeed, blame your parents", also liked "Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. 95. Children, Food, Firsts. "If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else." — Yogi Berra. - Woody Allen . "You can't spell "HERO" without "HR"." - unknown "HR just told me that yelling "I don't want to play anymore!" is not the proper way to exit a meeting." - unknown "If at first you don't succeed, try doing what HR told you to do the first time." - unknown It was made famous by Edward Hickson's Moral song. "Some days I amaze myself. Not everyone has perfect taste." If at first you don't succeed, pay someone else to do it for you. ~ If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer. Since then, it's been said by almost every teacher I know. If at first you succeed, then what? . "If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you." - Steven Wright. Don't let your fears and doubts hold you back! Please be patient even a toilet can handle only one asshole at a time. "If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else." ~ Yogi Berra. - William Lyon Phelps I'm sick of following my dreams. "Are you casting asparagus on my cooking?". It probably will get worse. Quentin Crisp If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything. - Yogi Berra 176. "It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by then I was too . 18. No use being a damn fool about it." W.C. Fields . For you, that's cearly the wrong strategy. I'd encourage most people to be themselves. 2. Add to Chapter. "If at first, you don't succeed, try, try, and try again". If At First You Don't Succeed Try Doing What Human Resources Told You To Do The First Time: Blank and Lined Notebook, Human Resources Gifts, Funny HR Notebook Journal, Coworker Gifts Paperback - December 21, 2019 by Creative Quotes (Author) 20 ratings See all formats and editions Paperback $6.95 2 New from $6.95 2. If you have any questions or want to add to the list, please drop them in the comments section below! Sam Ewing 8. How may I help you?". If at first you don't succeed. At home, many kids won't be able to focus, but they need to keep on trying. If at first, you don't succeed, try again until you bleed; The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make a mistake. Whether you're looking for funny quotes to make a point, enliven a presentation, give a toast, or just for your own amusement, you've come to the right place. 18. "If at first, you don't succeed, take the tax loss." — Kirk Kirkpatrick, entrepreneur "It's better to be a pirate than to join the navy." — Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple "Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day. I think I've forgotten this before.', 'If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.', and 'I just got out of the hospital. 6. Joe Girard. So eternal happiness is beaten by a ham sandwich. Then we met. If you don't at least try, you have already failed. Famous for his Deep Thoughts, b.1949) Similar Quotes. while others wake up and work hard at it. Embed Code. You will never get out of it alive. "All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure." - Mark Twain. *Some people dream about success. Add to Chapter. — Mark Forsyth. Explore More Quotes. "Robert H Schuller: The Inspirational Writings : Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do/Tough Minded Faith for Tender Hearted People", Bbs Publishing Corporation. The full quote is "Tis a lesson you should heed, try, try again. Don't ever stop dating your wife, Don't ever stop flirting with your husband. If at first, you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you. If at first you don't succeed, try, try, and try again". Groucho Marx No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar. Funny Success Quotes. Read More: Funny Senior Quotes. Steven Wright. *Success doesn't come to you-you go to it. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure. There is no comparison between that which is lost by not succeeding and that which is lost by not trying. Funny Quotes . I find TV very educational. Be Unique. Smile because if you don't, everyone will ask you what's wrong. Curly Howard If at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking till you do succeed. "Well being as there's no other place around the place, I reckon this must be the place, I reckon.". I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later. ". When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye. Below you will find a collection of motivating, happy, and encouraging funny quotes, funny sayings, and funny proverbs. Shut the door, drop your pants, climb on top of me, and satisfy your needs. We print the highest quality if at first you dont succeed try doing long sleeve t-shirts on the internet *Success is a journey, not a destination. "If at first you don't succeed, try a little ardor" See also. More information There is no failure except in no longer trying. Tags: if at first you dont succeed, skydiving isnt for you, you dont succeed, funny memes, succeed, quote, if at first you dont succeed skydiving isnt for you, isnt for you, skydiving, humor sarcastic, skydiving humorous, sayings sports quote, sky idea, skydiver awesome, cool diving letters, skydiving is not for you, jump danger, dead die failing, fear funny meme, hobbies i love, motivation . " The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. Limitations - Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can walk. 9. You can dust it off and try again. Me and my wife lives happily for 20 years. Quotation: " If at first you don't succeed, give up. "Do not take life too seriously. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Toilet seat: "Put me down". . ~Author unknown, c. 1990s If at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you. "If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you." - Steven Wright. Life doesn't have any hands, but it can sure give you a slap sometimes. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.Steven Wright. You're a unit now. If at first you don't succeed, Try, try, try again. When the going gets tough, the tough just quit." - Jim Rome. I was . If at First You Don't Succeed Try Doing What the PE Teacher Told You to Do: Funny PE Teacher Appreciation Gift, Journal with Lined and Blank Pages [Teacher Appreciation Quotes and Gifts] on Amazon.com. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you. 5. Act like it. Don't run to your mom if your spouse does something you don't like. I find television very educational 1968 & if at first you don't succeed funny quotes ; Put me down quot. And author 17 Palmer if at first you don & # x27 ; t succeed pants climb! Handle only one asshole at a time more on Quotes/Memes by Chrystal Wolf Professor 1865-1943. 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